I do remember a sort of curiosity about penises, as in, ‘why do they have one of those and I don’t?’ but that was as far as it went. Until I hit puberty. I didn’t fancy boys the way the other girls in my class did. I felt my eyes roll as they discussed how cute so and so was or how she’d love to kiss what’s his name. I just wanted to hang out with them. Tomboy was a useful smokescreen but the arguments still raged.“No, I won’t wear the pretty pink dress. I want to wear my jeans.” This was then swiftly followed by “No, I don’t like long hair, I want it cut short.” Thankfully, they relented on the hair. The excuse that it was hard to dry and control after swimming seemed to work. But school was the worst. I’d look at the boys uniform in envy. They could just wear trousers while I was forced into a green crimplene skirt and grey knee-length socks. My ugly knees and pale skin exposed to the world. I think I was first called “a fucking lezzer” when I was sixteen years old. My lack of. ”“Well, the sex is…” Laurie stopped herself, “but you’re right, It is about something more.” “Do you know what this Circle is? I mean, what it REALLY is?” Rebecca continued, “For the longest time, each of us has been, like, the woman of the house, y’know? Whatever we were going through, that was always the center of it; We all knew what it was like to be without a Mom, but we knew that no matter what, we could always count on each other. And now…” she sighed again, “ALL of you are now REALLY the women of the house.”“Wow. She’s right,” Beth said. “I’ve been trying to put my finger on what changed, and that’s it.”“And THAT’S what I want, too. I want to be that for MY dad.” Becky wiped her face again. “So, finish your story, Stacey.”“Really?”“Absolutely. Hell, you were inspired by these two,” Rebecca motioned to Laurie and Beth, “So hopefully, I’ll be inspired by you.”“Well, then,” Stacey smiled. “Where was I?”***Stacey told them how her and her father made dinner together, standing.
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